http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Our computers can beat your computers. en-us jbenini@gmail.com 2007-03-04T23:49:30-05:00 hourly 1 2000-01-01T12:00+00:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2007_03.html Ok... This goes beyond just hating mash-ups. I can understand his argument. Some are uninspired, some are just done to be clever within a 30 second chorus or 5 second hook but fade off fast. Some songs just shouldn’t go together and some are just mixed as a dare or to come up with some kind of clever mash name like "Coolio Iglesias" or "Britney Spearchucker" (You can’t use those... I claim them, they are mine… DJ Bubble Rap comin’atcha 2007 baby!) Every now and then I like to drop a mashup track that I feel is particularly clever or work well on a whole new level that I think Brandon will get, that it’ll just make sense to him and turn him back on to it. That's right, In classic Brando fashion, he was into it way before any of us. Before the whole bootleg / bastard pop scene blew up Brando was circulating the Mat Tuozzo mix tape. Exhibit 1 – Said Mix Tape Exhibit 2 – Matt Tuozzo’s Wikipedia page Exhibit 3 - TeamTechno's (For which Matt is a part of.) Pretty nifty page, loads of IDM goodness. So he turns me on to this genre, then abandons me. From the way he speaks about it, it’s like he’s grown out of it. Granted I’m easily amused, the only way is that he was either wanting or expecting more from his music. 'Course when he was running the radio show he was going through 15 albums a week so he can be all the condescending music bitch he wants, he’s earned it. But I though I found something... Something so different, so evolved, so expertly woven together that it was either the undertaking of a genius or a mad man and he would have to like it. If not like it than at least see the beauty of it all. A complete deconstruction/reconstruction of the music spanning 30 years. 200 of the most memorable riffs, hooks and beats playing background to 200 of the most up to date hip-hop/r&b choruses. I delivered to him Girl Talk’s 'Night Ripper'. I mean, Lil' Wayne over Weezer, Young Jeezy vs Elton John, Ludacris and Manfred Mann... HOLY SHIT! THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT! The transisions are seamless and rapid fire. The vocals and backgrounds are not eve trying to stay in one place but as they shift it never misses a beat. It's un-fucking-believable. It's like dropping your CD collection in a blender and snorting the end result. A direct assault of your primary auditory cortex. Hell... you can make a drinking game of it. You have to name the song in which the vocal track or music background came from quickly before it changes. You get it, everyone else drinks. If it's a sample of a sample and you name the original track once removed, everyone drinks twice. You'll be drunk, blind and musically inclined in no time. I really really want this to get around. If not because... 106@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Music 2007-03-04T23:49:30-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2007_03.html How glad I am that I stumbled upon the internet phenomenon known as The Angry Video Game Nerd. He doesn't review games as much as he hurls insults and f-bombs with a total abandon for whether his remarks even resemble intelligent thought... Tourette's syndrome is a sad thing, but this guy makes it kinda funny though. As you can guess, this is not very family friendly and is pretty NSFW unless your work environment plays fast and loose with colorful language. With numerous references to particular parts of the male anatomy, the rectum, the scrotum, liquid bowel movements and other bits to describe the horrible games of yesteryear, this is my new guilty pleasure. It's like a gamer's equivalent of American Gladiators; where the worse it is, the more fun it is to watch and inevitably the more low-brow it gets. Angry Video Game Nerd is just one player in the larger ScrewAttack Network of Video Game sites. This is my new favorite video game news consortium. They haven’t replaced Consolvania in my mind, they are just easier to understand, not being Scottish and all. I mean, Consolvaina still rock my face off just for the fact that they had a Hitler’s do a review of Driv3r, John Wayne Gacey do reviews for children’s games and are pretty much the only other credible game news source besides Ian to know of the existence of L.O.L. for the Dreamcast (No serious, Ian was on to something with this, Lack Of Love for DC is amazing, Fuck Spore… watch this, L.O.L. review kicks in at 3:40). Speaking of, the Consolvania Wii-Friendly Page is a great way to watch all of the CV eps at work or school or anywhere with a decent broadband line to abuse... And of course, it's Wii friendly. While I'm trying to coax you to watch things, below I include the 2006 Angry Video Game Nerd Top 10. A highlights reel of some of the best moments which still remain incredible hilarious out of the context of the original review, but below that I have included links to some of my favorite reviews. Submitted you for approval, even though I really don't give a shit what you think, The 2006 Angry Video Game Nerd Top 10. If you have the time and are not easliy offended, do yourself a favor and watch these... Sequel Numbering Confusion - Street Fighter, Rambo, Naked Gun, nothing is safe... Ghostbusters Back To The Future Power Glove Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Double Dragon III Nightmare on Elm Street Bible Games ^_^ - Part 1 | Part 2 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III Movie Review- Part 1 | Part 2... 105@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Linkage 2007-03-03T20:14:13-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2007_03.html So. Um.. If you don't do it in a while, do you become a second-virgin... First-Post?... 107@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Misc. 2007-03-02T10:40:05-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2006_02.html 104@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2006-02-10T16:37:16-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_12.html Wow, two posts in one month... I must be on a roll. This one is more of a hypocritical observation turned rant. It’s OK when I do it, but I don’t want to have to watch you... Apparently this is a wide spread issue (Come on, go to the link, the Amazon review for a pair of underware are not NEARLY as funny as the ones for say... ‘How to Date White Women... A Guide for Asian Men’, Amazon removed the offensive {read: hilarious} reviews, but that doesn’t stop the Internets from recording their existence.) But still, at what age exactly do men decide that it is perfectly acceptable to adjust their pants in public? Of course I’m not talking about in the parking lot behind a Ford Expedition or in the suddenly forresty part of central park. I mean, waiting for the subway, in the ticket line at the movies, at the deli, on college tours... Dad... There are different maneuvers that can be accomplished to both relieve yourself and make some attempt to adjust ‘your self.’ Most men go for the ‘bunch and pull’ method but the brazen go for the gold and try to do the ‘No, Really, I’m scratching my stomach southward and... oh, what is this? My hand has managed to fall into my pants. QUICK, RETREAT!’ Of course we cannot forget the infamous public ATM adjustment. This one is a special one because the line of people behind you really have nothing else to focus on while they wait. The ATM wait is an awkward amount of time, it’s not like you have time to get through a few pages of the fourteenth century french novella you keep in your rear pocket, unless you’re a speed reader….I know because I’ve tried this, and it’s just as dangerous as reading while you’re next in line at the post office. One of the people behind you will always find the free teller first and treat you like an asshole for personally slowing down their day and taking up their time. Rollins called it murder to the Nth degree. Not so if your doing it intentionally, it’s fun. I save those minutes I steal from peoples lives throughout the day and keep them in jars in the in the basement. It’s like a retirement fund. TIME is a function of the UNIVERSE, it is not relative to YOU. You are not running on different time than US. How about I loan you an hour, some time around the fall equinox; but I’m going to expect that hour back and maybe some interest. Interest... I’m in line at the bank... So you have two choices – you can either catch up on the newest home mortgage rates for smiling diverse CitiBank families posted on the far wall (How nice, the Asians will be buying a home with their newly approved loan and the African-Americans got low interest debt consolidation account. Something tells me, despite the smiles, the Asian... 103@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-12-07T08:49:12-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_12.html Hi·a·tus - A gap or interruption in space, time, or continuity; a break. ... Pro·cras·ti·na·tion - The act or habit of procrastinating, or putting off to a future time; delay; dilatoriness. actually, the real problem is: Dis·trac·tion - A condition or state of mind in which the attention is diverted from an original focus or interest. I have so much other shit I have to do that is taking up my time otherwise spent blogging. This in it of itself is a problem because being that I’m up to so much, I should have lots to write about. In reality it’s just the opposite. I have been so busy with the BS day to day, work and class stuffs; that any moment spent for personal time gets blown sleeping or devoted to games and hanging out. The new thing is company trips. Now that I’m assisting the IT guy (that IT as in ‘it’, as in ‘tag your it’), while he’s pulling network administration stuffs, I’m bouncing around the lower 48 states to set up depositions. Great when it comes to baby-sitting a bunch of attorneys in downtown D.C., not so great when you have to got to Wisconsin, Ohio or Iowa. I didn’t even think they had laws in Iowa, never mind law firms. Like I really want to spend my day setting up a deposition for Bumpkin, Bumpkin & Cousinlover (LLP). BTW, WTF is up with the ‘Quiet Car’? Between the rumble of the train and the hiss of the overhead air nozzle, the sound of an iPod is just too much for these people. Maybe if your using those shitty white headphones that come with it, but if you have even a decent earbuds, they completely seal any noise going in or COMING OUT. My eardrum could be hemorrhaging and the person next to me would be none the wiser. These things are quiet but deliver big sound in your ear. It’s like when your on an airplane and they politely tell everyone that they should turn off all electronic devices or we’ll crash. I usually still have my earbuds in at this time. EVERY TIME. The plane is one big electronic device. I don’t see them turning it off and gliding back onto the runway. To appease them though I pull that move where the ear facing away from them still has the earbud in, while the other ear is exposed. That’s apparently enough to convince them. Gets that stewardess bitch every time. But anyways. I really enjoyed my last trip to Washington DC. I almost look forward to the next time I go out that way. It was a lot nicer that I expected. Capitol area DC kinda sucks, but Downtown had a bunch of bars and stores and was just metropolitan enough to get by. Everything is clean, it’s not nearly as crowded and their subway system is reminiscent of the Disney tram ride (That’s right... it’s a ride.) It works more or less... 102@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-12-05T20:33:14-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_09.html Ok, for starters: The link to the House of Cosbys is here, y'see. Now go and watch all of 'em. I love you BC-D2. And now for the greatest bad idea I have ever had. Much thanks for Brandon, Jess & Lea for bringing these ideas to fruition.... 101@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-09-12T23:27:31-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_08.html Big Ups for Nintendo today. Granted this is all old stuff that I have been storing forever, I think it's about time I get the links out there. I love 4 Color Rebellion, and this pic is one of the reasons why. Hot Inu on Inu puppy action... I pray this is a hoax but if not, here is another game for Jack Thompson/Hillary Clinton to go after. Hehe... Puppy Love ^_^ Also the crackheads over at N-Philes managed to exploit every last bit of the Super Smash Bros. Melee debug menu, resulting is some very questionable and crazy things. There are a butt-load of extra or partially developed characters and levels that are apparently still in the final version of the game. Using some creative ActionReplay codes and resource tweaking a-la Hot Coffee, the content can be reactiveated via Debug Menu... Like GigaBowser. Who would win in a fight? GigaBowser or Godzilla? Old school Gojira, not pussy 1998-Remake Godzilla. I mean.... GigaBowsers spits fireballs, right?... 100@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ 2005-08-30T11:01:52-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_08.html South Korean scientists have reportedly cloned a male Afghan hound, this news of course come a good 50 years too late to ever save Old Yeller. This technology coupled with the latest discovery in suspended animation: Zombie Dogs (this article is worth it, being that it uses the most unfortunate picture of a wolf to depict the lightly chilled Zombie Dog). "You kick my dog!" Well, don't worry pal because I got another one of 'em. The "frisky, healthy, normal, rambunctious puppy" was named "Snuppy" which at first glance could have bad engrish for "Snoopy" of Peanuts fame, but actually is intentional and comes from Seoul National University Puppy; the only unfortunate name that of the lead researcher, Woo Suk Hwang... I WISH I was making that up. I'm sure there is nothing wrong with a cloned puppy, as there have been cloned sheep, cats and rats before. Granted none of them are nearly as cool as the iridescent glowing rabbit, "Snuppy" does have his plusses like glowing red eyes, copious amounts of viscous drool, and an unearthly howl that makes babies cry and causes normal dogs who hear it to lose bowel control and leap in front of FedEx trucks. RePet fans rejoyce as this may one day be a viable solution to never loosing your beloved Patches, Scruffy or Sam. ^_^ Dogs are thought to be the most difficult animal to clone due to their very complex and unusual reproductive system, but have you ever tried to get a poodle to stand still on a Xerox machine?? Damn near impossible. As for their "unusual reproductive system", apparently the answer as to why a dog will spend one third of it's life "licking it's own chops" is not "because they can" but the mind-blowing taste that only a canine can truly appreciate. 2,000 years of Poochi evolution, domestication and otherwise and they still can't find a tastier treat than the insides of their own ass. Then again, there is always the other dog's ass. If anything that is where their evolutionary strength comes in. Humans date, live together, court each other to no end in pursuit of knowing if their significant other is "The One", dog have reduced this to a 45 second snuffing of the anus, resulting in a sort of "Yeah" or "Nah" type of response. Mark might think that Richard Stallman is a genius, but it's completely unnecessary to emulate your heroes by adopting his policy of shrewd abstinence... or was that unintentional. Go and sniff around to see what’s out there. You might get slapped, but you might get a phone number. Or you can join me on my couch, downing cough syrup, playing Katamari Damacy 2 in my underwear; occasionally looking over to watch my cat masturbate or puppy discover the many levels of flavor offered by eating paint chips or licking the bathroom floor tile. ::gross:: And by the title, I’m not insinuating that all Asians eat dog; only the North Koreans and... 99@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-08-08T15:37:37-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_08.html OK, before Brandon sets up official squatter's rights and claims the blog as his own, I figured I had to drop something down. Between work, obligation to others and general procrastination, I have pretty much lost the will to do anything. I get home and spend maybe a hour or two rearranging downloads, messing around with the PSP and watching TV before having to call it a night for work the next day. I feel like an old man. I'm also noticeably more cynical and bitter to those I would usually be indifferent or at least pleasant with. I probably just need a vacation. Just a large block of time off to accomplish some of the smaller things I've been putting to the side or at least to just do nothing and relax. Some of the things that I have been putting off are either half way completed or just need a little bit more initiative to stop being just an idea in my head and become a reality. I've wanted to throw together another Pod Cast for the longest time, also wanted to put together a decent mix for the UNKLE77 Board. There are a bunch of silkscreen/stencil t-shirt designs I have been thinking about for a while that I want to get out of my head and on to something tangible. Of course, my apartment is in need of some major clean-up. Or I could just say to hell with it and go back to WipeOut, Katamari Damaci 2 and waiting for Burnout Revenge... ... ... Fuck Hot-Coffee. Understand what something is before you attack it. Look for another witch to burn at the stake cause I'm tired of hearing about this one. Obligatory Links: Silkscreening for lazy people: I miss you Mr. Tracey. Things you should never say to teacher during your design critique. : Ever wonder what it would be like to never get anything productive done EVER AGAIN. Cause this is my United States of My Racist Aunt. Threadless- Pandamonium: I love you Panda. Google Maps + High Yield Explosive Simulations = HYDESim.... 98@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-08-02T12:01:30-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_07.html I'm as surprised as you are that I've received a comment on my Judith Miller piece. I was serious when I said that you don't care. However, it seems I was wrong. Someone named "b", though initially only interested in U.N.K.L.E., found his way through the entire post. Using up his last bit of strength, after what I'm positive was an extremely dry and not entirely accurate read, "b" managed to let me know about his opinions. Normally I'd disregard him, but he seems to be more interested in explaining his position to me than asking me for U.N.K.L.E. albums or proclaiming that Judy Miller is a terrorist and so am I. So, "b", you've made a good point that I failed to address. Wilson, or, in fact, anyone else mentioned in this last post, could be lying to you and I. It doesn't seem like too much of a stretch to say that everyone involved is looking out for their own best interests, first and foremost. It's quite difficult to leave your own politics out of anything that you do, and I don't think I can expect it of anyone. Does that mean that I support it? No, not in the least. However, I am saying that when I get information from anyone, I anticipate the bias based on their particular lean. Wilson has political beliefs, so does Karl Rove, and I'm willing to bet that Judith Miller has her own as well. I can't claim to know the truth, but I can claim the information that I've presented here has been given to me. If that seems like a weak hand for serious opinions, then ignore me; chalk me up to a rambling misinformed blogger, but know that all I have is the information I've gathered and my opinions on that information. The former I can not stand by any more than it is proven, and the latter is the firm ground I'll stand until I can trade it for firmer. All of this is why I affirmed in the closing paragraph that I don't care what Judith Miller's reasons for refusing to name her source is. If her source hasn't released her from her promise of confidentiality, then I'm proud of her resolve to face her sentence for civil contempt, and she has taken responsiblity and faced it. I know that what she is doing is illegal, I know that what Judge Hogan has prescribed for her sentence is fitting, but I also know that I think that this act of defiance should not be a crime. The orders to reveal her source should never have been issued, and therefore Miller would have had nothing to defy. Alas, this is not the way our federal law works. Judith Miller does what she feels is best, and Judge Hogan does what he feels is best. I don't remember, however, Judith Miller protesting the court's ruling. There were legal appeals, and then there was a refusal to testify, but... 97@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ 2005-07-18T21:56:49-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_07.html I want to talk about Judith Miller of the New York Times, and why she's in jail right now. I know you don't care, but that's what makes the explosion in blogging so wonderful. You won't read this, and I won't care. However, in the interest of full disclosure, I'll have you know that I use First Amendment rights constantly, both directly and indirectly, and so I have a previously established interest in this case. Now I'll let you know why you have an interest, but may not know it. I'm not so naive to reduce the situation surrounding the leak of CIA agent Valerie Plame's name to the information that I've got on hand. I'm sure, as with all things political, that there are a number of factors on all sides of the event, the issue and the outcomes, that play a part in what has and will go on. These factors are both covert and overt. The one thing that I do know, despite the secrecy surrounding this case, is that I enjoy and appreciate the first amendment, as I may have explained already. So allow me to go into a brief explanation of how I understand this ordeal to have taken place. Subsequent to that, I will briefly tell you why I care, so as to inspire you to care. That's right, all the reward you'll get for reading this is what I'll let pass as my opining condescension. A long time ago, you may remember that our American president informed us that Saddam Hussein, infamous dictator of Iraq, was attempting to purchase yellowcake uranium from Niger. He cited documents, that detailed the transaction sought, as evidence of this. This was a primary crutch to a war to depose Hussein from power, and, as was the hope, neutralize this threat of an Iraqi nuclear weapons program. As it so happens, these documents were questioned. It seemed the questions were intended to prevent us from invading a country on a preemptive strike carried on false claims of weapons of mass destruction. Saddam Hussein was certainly not a champion of human rights, but the question at hand was his intent to procure yellowcake uranium from Niger. Before Bush had used these documents to bolster his efforts to rally the American people behind him to go to war with Iraq, the CIA had sent Ambassador Joseph C. Wilson to Niger to verify the documents' claims. Wilson determined the documents to be a forgery based on the Nigerien (Pronounced nee-ZHAIR-ee-an, and now you know the adjective form of Niger.) yellowcake mining operation's international management and the International Atomic Energy Agency oversight. Wilson, who verified his findings with the US ambassador to Niger, Barbro Owens-Kirkpatrick, concluded that with the magnitude of international interests in the oversight of yellowcake mining, and other factors he'd reveal publicly later, that the covert sale of it to Iraq just wasn't possible. This ordeal came to be known as the Yellowcake Forgery and though the validity is... 96@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ 2005-07-15T18:30:00-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_07.html “Your failing business model is not my fault or my problem.” I remember reading that somewhere and it couldn’t hold truer. In every other Pro-MPAA / Pro-RIAA argument I hear the point brought up that media sales are suffering due to widespread piracy and internet with such nasty technological advances as Napster and BitTorrent are stealing from the media industry. Welcome to Media Post-Industrialism. There's a whole lot more... Read On.... 95@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ Rants 2005-07-05T19:14:03-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_07.html So far as I'm concerned, rewriting comic dialogue doesn't get much funnier than this handful of Rejected "Love Is..." Comics. Here's two to get you started: Fuck you, I like this stuff. Sensitive and modest? Maybe not, but it's damn funny.... 94@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ 2005-07-03T19:02:18-05:00 http://blog.stupidmammal.net/archives/2005_07.html Everyone should read about Mark. He's a bastard, but he makes a good point that I feel needs to be made. What a logical and forward-thinking post disguised under the blanket of him being a bastard. I think he shouldn't write off his opinions so quickly, as he almost always has merit. Though, despite his disgust with the newsmedia, I feel they're still an important source of real news, though they seem to be doing everything in their power to hide that... now I wonder why? I'd think that because news is a commodity and not a service, the best way to turn a profit is to increase the entertainment value, thereby increasing the number of people who are willful news consumers. Just because a news item is entertaining doesn't mean that it is less meaningful or important than dry, vanilla news (see The Daily Show for an example), but quite often that disparity is the rule. Maybe, the major news outlets find a better profit by disseminating news that panders to low-intelligence, sensationalistic tastes. I mean, everyone can decide their opinion on shark attacks very quickly. The common opinion may well be that very few people are in the market to be attacked by a shark. A piece on a shark attack also plays on our direct fear of falling victim to an angry or hungry shark. So to both protect and entertain yourself you learn about the shark attack in very short uninformative bursts from the reporter, and then satisfy your sick curiosity by listening to the family of the victim and perhaps the accounts of onlookers. It's drama and it's real, and you can enjoy that without anyone you know being consumed by an animal. This formula becomes very different when someone is presented with a deeper or more intelligent topic, such as a case of eminent domain. (If you don't want to register for the Washington Post, just download BugMeNot for Firefox and it'll take care of registration sites for you.) This may be a difficult case to understand, though it has greater potential to affect every American than a shark attack, as I found out in a bit of brief superficial research that there were 10,000 American eminent domain cases between 1998 and 2002, however, there were only about 224 shark attacks in American waters in that same time period. This means that in America, you're about 4400% more likely to have your home seized by the government than you are to be attacked by a shark. If you don't believe that cities plan on taking advantage of this precedent setting decision, then understand that the mayor of Washington, D.C. is already planning to use this decision in two separate projects: to levy private property to build an upscale shopping mall and a baseball stadium for the district's new baseball team, the Nationals. (Take some pleasure that the justices of the Supreme Court are not uniquely protected from the effects of their decisions that all... 93@http://blog.stupidmammal.net/ 2005-07-02T21:53:39-05:00